Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Sadly Weep our Daughters in the 'Land of Five Rivers'.


..For sadly weep our daughters in the 'Land of Five Rivers'.

The pages of Sri Guru Granth Sahib are replete with many names for God, some are masculine in gender while others are feminine…But that, that remains a commonality is that all these names are used to describe God. A fair deduction drawn from this is that our Gurus did not consider God to be either male or female.

The Mool Mantra states that God is Ajuni (Unborn), in other words, God belongs to neither sex.

If this be the case, then why does our patriarchal society impose stern taboos only on the being of girl child?
Why do our girls get subjected to biases and remain illiterate and ill-treated?
For all its glory that we talk of, it is a horrendous practice in Punjab where by infants are murdered …All without a single exception are little baby girls put to death by their own parents or at the least by their mute consent.

This observable ritual of female infanticide is as old as the Sphinx in many cultures …the Arab and Asian countries, such as Algeria, Afghanistan, Pakistan, and India have remained till date male dominated in mind sets and place a much higher worth on the male gender of the species. A large number of infants are killed at birth immediately after it is revealed that they are not a male child.                                                                                                     

It is maybe a symptomatic manifestation of the evil dowry system…. If a son of one family is to get married to a daughter of another, the bride’s family is expected to give large sums of money and gifts to the groom’s family. So, what we make of this is quite simple….That having a daughter is a monetary burden on the family as a whole and it may bankrupt a poor folks which have more than one daughter. Dowry is legally not acceptable and banned, but then the ban is largely ignored and has become a social curse of mammoth proportions far more demanding than it was in yester years.

It is now up to you, young people to say ‘NO’ to Dowry…Take no dowry….give no Dowry.
Reject It.
This ‘Son Syndrome’ coupled with the financial burden of having a girl has perhaps egged on the practice of infanticide in regards to the female babies.
What have I done ?
It is quite possible that some of the hapless parents of baby girls are reluctantly driven towards infanticide for the fear of the financial demands that will be imposed on them. Next time we hear about this ghastly sin heaving our society. We should stop and take the 'Halo' off our head, for in some ways we are responsible for the rot that has set in. It is the entire fabric of society that is rotten,the  pitiful mother often has no say in this, she in all likelihood remains sidelined…. The decision to kill the little baby girl lies with the patriarch of the family…. But he does not dirty his hands himself. Midwives are there….Midwives are very common in rural India …she assists in childbirth, and if need be for a generous consideration may be coerced to put an end to life of the little baby girl soon after her birth.
Did you know that there are family secrets passed down generations, much like the recipes, for killing these infants? 
And you will shudder to think how? ….It is so horrific that it feels like it is the dark ages and not the 21st century.
Sometimes the infants are fed milk laced with sap of poisonous plants or pesticides. Others are given rice paddy with the husks still attached to swallow …This slits their tender throat. Other methods include feeding them salt to increase blood pressure.

I have heard of some very gruesome physical methods as well…like being stuffed in clay pots, holding the baby by the waist and shaking it - which snaps the spinal cord - or simply snapping their necks…..One of the popular serials currently being aired has tried to lay bare the ugliness and shows little girls drowned in large urns of milk and water.
The heartless remorseless perpetuators responsible perhaps settle the qualms that I’m sure they have, by thinking that these methods are all quick and painless, which they are not and little infants must suffer. Okay, they may be painless and simple for them to execute… But they are barbaric.
Can we allow this to happen?
Remember if we keep quiet, then we become partners in crime.

In China girls are abandoned in hospices, where they live in poor conditions and starved to death. These places have earned the nickname the "dying rooms" because they spend most of their lives chained to their bed and being fed meager amounts of food.
A woman in Islam is not usually allowed to choose who she is to marry. She lives her without a persona behind a niqab or a burqa. In many Muslim countries a woman cannot leave the house without a male relative's presence or permission. She is often beaten by her husband and could be divorced with simple ‘Talaq’. Women in Saudi Arabia emerge time and again as victims of discrimination and human rights violations because of the gender bias in law, social mores and traditions. In Saudi Arabia women are not allowed to drive or leave the country without approval from their husband or father.

If this is not all…We now have ‘Honour killings’…...And these are not occurrences in the remote interiors of Bharat….But the killings are the urbanised feudal continuance of caste discrimination in towns and cities of modern India…To be real even Delhi.
Honour crimes are acts of violence, usually murder, committed by brothers, uncles and in some cases a father is part of the plot against the young girl of the family, who is seen to have brought dishonour upon the ’Khandaan ki izzat’. This ill fated girl is targeted for a multiplicity of reasons, ….refusing to agree to an arranged marriage, being the victim of a sexual assault, seeking a divorce—even from an abusive husband—or committing the sin of being in love…..Heavens help, for this  is adulterous in the eyes of the sanctimonious family. The mere perception that a woman has behaved in a way that "dishonours" her family is sufficient to trigger an attack on her life.
Ahh!! How can we forget the trauma of child marriage….a detrimental time-honored practice that weds children.  Here, once again it is the girls, very young girls married to men who are usually much much older than their new bride. 
15 year old girl sold as bride of 70 year old man in Pakistan
Fortunately ‘Sati’  is one social evil that is  more or less an exception now….Sati is the Hindu practice of a widow immolating herself on her husband's funeral pyre.
"Sati" means a virtuous woman. A woman who dies burning herself on her husband's funeral fire was considered most virtuous and worshipped as a Goddess, and temples were built in her memory.

Sati was supposed to be voluntary, but it is known that it has often been forced. Setting aside the issue of social pressures, many accounts exist of women being physically forced to their deaths. The practice of Sati was prohibited and widow-remarriage was encouraged….nevertheless it has remained a law on paper and very little can be seen in practice.








Guru Nanak challenged the idea of woman being inferior to man and unchained her from gender biases inflicted on her by the man centric society.
 In one of his hymns, he said:
From woman, man is born; within woman, man is conceived; to woman he is engaged and married. Woman becomes his friend; through woman, the future generations come. When his woman dies, he seeks another woman; to woman he is bound. So why call her bad? From her, kings are born. From woman, woman is born; without woman, there would be no one at all. O Nanak, only the True Lord is without a woman. That mouth which praises the Lord continually is blessed and beautiful. O Nanak, those faces shall be radiant in the Court of the True Lord.  || 2 || (Page 473)

All the Guru’s gave woman a status equal to that of man. They regarded woman as man's companion in every walk of life. The Gurus thought this equality in time would be of mutual benefit.

The Guru’s said that a woman is the first teacher of man as his mother. Her role is to mould children and discipline them. She has to be educated so that her children may develop their potential to the fullest. She was allowed to join holy congregations, participate and conduct them…and was called 'the conscience of man'.

To the extent we saw that women soldiers fought side by side with male soldiers in some of the battles which Guru Gobind Singh fought.

That was then, it is times today that scare me, the devaluation of social fabric scares me….
I would like to ask these ‘honourable men’ of the patriarchal set up…..
 Are our daughters children of lesser God ?


12 comments:

  1. From the first words of Shri Guru Granth Sahib ji, the Mool Mantar, there is a long-perpetuated error in translation. Nowhere in the original is the masculine pronoun "he." Masculinising the Eternal distorts the very root of our religion. Might I suggest that it be translated as this one from SikhiWiki that eliminates gender entirely and is much closer than the original:

    One Universal Creator God. The Name Is Truth. Creative Being Personified. No Fear. No Hatred. Image Of The Undying, Beyond Birth, Self-Existent. By Guru's Grace

    Not a perfect translation - no translation ever is - but it is an improvement.

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  2. One Universal Creator God. The Name Is Truth. Creative Being Personified. No Fear. No Hatred. Image Of The Undying, Beyond Birth, Self-Existent. By Guru's Grace

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  3. It is really strange that in the state Punjab where on one side mothers are considered as 'Jannat da parchava' and everyone is delighted to sing praise of their beloved mothers, the females are considered inferior. The biggest evidence of which is the marriages in Punjab, where the girls family is bound to handle all the burden, even if they are from the most educated backgrounds.

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  4. Is it not sad....Bountiful land of Plenty...But it seems big hearts are giving way to arid and small
    hearts.

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  5. Preetinder Kaur Sikhism has been on of the modern religions where right from the begining men and women were treated equally. There are so many examples in our history that can be quoted to prove the equality given to both the genders. WHERE THE PROBLEM RAISED THAT RESULTED INTO LAGGING BEHIND AND IS FACING CURSES LIKE GIRL CHILD INFANTICIDES? The only one answer that I find relavent is that we have stepped back from following the teachings of GURU GRANTH SAHIB JI. Today daughters are weaping bcoz parenting has failed to inculcated teachings of GURU GRANTH SAHIB JI into lives of their kids. Physical world modernisation has ruined the external modernisation and the result is ===== Bleek World without Mothers as we are killing girl infants today who are going to be mothers of coming generations. ਸਰਬ ਭੂਤ ਏਕੈ ਕਰਿ ਜਾਨਿਆ ਚੂਕੇ ਬਾਦ ਬਿਬਾਦਾ ॥: Sarab bhoot ekai kar jaaniaa chooke baad bibaadaa: I look upon all beings alike, and my conflict and strife are ended (sggs 483).

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  6. Daar Ji Preetinder...You are right when you say we are a young and progressive religion....We have become dogmatic in approach and forgotten the spirit and spiritual content which our Guru's preached....
    Thursday at 10:04pm · Like · 3 people

    Daar Ji Preetinder...Thank you...Speak up...Do not let evil triumph!!!
    Thursday at 10:05pm · Like · 2 people

    Preetinder Kaur I will do my best. I just need ===== Blessings nd guidance of my elders, support of my fellow youngsters AND ABOVE ALL THE CORE DIRECTIONS FROM GURU GRANTH SAHIB JI.
    Thursday at 10:15pm · Like · 3 people

    Taranjit Singh According to National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB): In Every 60 minute, two women are raped in india. 133 elderly women were sx assulted last year. In 2008, 8172 dowry deaths were reported.
    In 2009, 203,804 cases were reported. In which 38.9 ...See More

    Friday at 12:11am · Like · 2 people
    Daar Ji Society is us ..taranjit....Let us begin by making ripples around us..

    Friday at 12:15am · Like · 2 people
    Taranjit Singh yep, but we have to aware about the reality. We can not move with blind eyes. We have to understand where is the fault. According to the available data female feoticide is not a major problem. As preached by others and specially badals 'Nani Chha'

    Friday at 12:17am · Like · 1 person
    Daar Ji Forget the politicos...Female infanticide and feoticide the stats are misguiding.....the actual figure is the tip of an iceberg. Even if one crime tales place against new borns and unborn...WE CANNOT KEEP QUIET>

    Friday at 12:21am · Like · 2 people
    Taranjit Singh yep, thats m saying. large number of cases goes unreported. But as per reported cases there were 8172 dowry deaths and only 264 female fioticide incidents. If it is the tip of an iceberg. Even then we know where is the problem. Yeh, we can not keep quite. But we have to address real matters.
    Friday at 12:23am · Like · 1 person
    Daar Ji We are accountable for all matters....If we do not speak up...

    Friday at 12:24am · Like · 1 person
    Taranjit Singh yep, also large number of baby dies because or unhygienic delivery conditions, none or less experienced of fake doctors, hunger and deceases. And it also happens in Max PCI punjab. have to address that too.

    Friday at 12:27am · Like · 1 person
    Preetinder Kaur In my opinion the truth is quiet ugly in regard to Punjab ===== in Punjab girl child is killed bcoz SIKHI has been lost from the families. Honour killings are there as parents of remote areas think a girl is going to give bad name as she grows up, parents need boy who can proceed the family name, society has become showy so poor parents cnt afford expenses for marriage and ABOVE ALL PARENTS OF NEW GENERATION ARE WEAK MORALLY SO THEY ADOPT SHORT CUT TO GET RID OF PROBLEMS AND ONE OF THEM IS KILLING OF GIRLCHILD.

    Friday at 1:49am · Like · 3 people

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  7. Daar Ji Ekampreet....Can we please begin again.HOW DO WE MAKE A DIFFERENCE? ....How can begin to change the way ppl think?
    Friday at 5:23pm · Like

    Preetinder Kaur TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE WE NEED A FLEET THAT IS READY TO WORK SELFLESSLY FOR THE SAKE OF OTHERS. TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE WE HAVE TO UNDERSTAND WHERE THE ACTUAL PROBLEM IS. TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE WE HAVE TO ACCEPT THE TRUTH THAT WE ARE NOT THE TRUE SIKHS WHO LIVE FOR HUMANITY AND DIE FOR HUMANITY. TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE WE HAVE TO WORK TOGETHER. TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE WE HAVE TO CONSIDER THIS PROBLEM AS OUR .....
    Friday at 5:43pm · Like · 2 people

    Daar Ji Your last point Preetinder is most valid and primary...TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE WE HAVE TO CONSIDER THIS PROBLEM AS OUR .... That means we accept the problem...To yr first point I do not agree ...The singular is most important. ..we do not need a fleet
    Friday at 5:46pm · Like

    Preetinder Kaur I TOO AGREE WITH U. FLEETS ARE MADE FROM GATHERING SINGLE UNITS JI. READ THE SAME POST BOTTOM TO TOP. TRUTH IS ===== ASSI NEWSPAPER DI NEWS NU FACTS NU READ KARDE AND CUP OF TEA DAE NAL HI ISSUE NU V OTHE HI CHAD DINDAE AND WAIT KARDE KE KADON AGG SADE GHAR TAK AAE GI ND THEN WE WILL TAKE SOME ACTION.
    Friday at 5:51pm · Like

    Daar Ji Our house is on fire P....Entire North India...Punjab Haryana Delhi...Honour killing,Rape, kidnapping,Dowry deaths,infanticide ,feoticide and more....and only girls are the target.
    Friday at 5:56pm · Like

    Preetinder Kaur THE BAISC THING IS THE YOUTH MIGHT BE AWARE OF THESE FACTS SO THAT THEY COME FORWARD FOR THE CAUSE THEMSELVES AND ACT. BUT MODERNISATION OF LIVING STANDARDS HAVE LED TO DEPLETION. one thing that has been evaluated is that parents who have b...See More
    Friday at 5:56pm · Like

    Daar Ji Ahhh!! now we are at the crux of the matter....You have rightly put yr finger on it.Young adults have to be made aware ...Awakening.And that is exactly what we are doing here.
    Friday at 6:15pm · Like

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  8. aar Ji Daar Ji http://iamdaarji.blogspot.com/2011/03/sadly-weep-our-daughters-in-land-of_16.htm l.... Please speak up!!!!

    Thursday at 1:40am · Like
    Davinder Kumar Malhotra that is the reason we have chors governing us,as good people shun politics.this has to change
    Thursday at 5:59am · Like

    Daar Ji It begins with us ... :-)
    Thursday at 10:43am · Like · 1 person

    Mann Timetv good people think good
    Thursday at 10:51am · Like · 1 person


    Akram Yar nice thinking...
    Thursday at 2:04pm · Like

    Daar Ji To the extent we saw that women soldiers fought side by side with male soldiers in some of the battles which Guru Gobind Singh fought.

    That was then, it is times today that scare me, the devaluation of social fabric scares me….I would like t...
    See More
    Thursday at 9:39pm · Like · 1 person

    Daar Ji Young people please do not let evil triump!!!
    Thursday at 9:40pm · Like · 1 person

    Arkamal Kaur very well said.......Really good ppl think good.....
    Thursday at 11:22pm · Like

    Daar Ji Thank You my young friends....But please do not let evil triumph.
    Thursday at 11:37pm · Like · 1 person

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  9. Davinder Kumar Malhotra BETIYAN KHUDA KI NEMAT HAIN
    Thursday at 1:02pm · Like

    Daar Ji My heart wept when I researched and wrote this blog post....Pl start a debate...Do not let evil triumph.
    Thursday at 9:41pm · Like

    Davinder Kumar Malhotra let us fix a CAPITAL punishment 4 all who kill daugters borne or unborne

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  10. Aroona Reejhsinghani u are right sir even today women are treated as second class citizens although without a woman a man is bobdy it is a woman who gives birth to a man but who will make the man understand only honourable men like u who are intelligent and honest can understand a womans problems may God increase ur tribe
    March 17 at 11:27am · Like

    Daar Ji Aroona Thank you...If you believe that soul travels through time and space...Then we have transmigration of souls....And transmigration sees no gender..No caste....No racial divides...No religion...No borders..So my dear where does that leave us....!!!

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  11. Dedicate To All Girls .
    .
    .
    Sun Ni Sohniye jamdiye Kudiye,
    Jag Kehna Tenu Kismat Thudiye,
    Ki Dsa Hun Mai Es Jag Nu,
    Ki Lhamba Dawa Mai Os Rabb Nu.
    Kyo Kissamat Likhi Hai Eni Maadi,
    Dukh Taqleefa Ch Jindgi Saari,
    Tenu Janam To Pehla Maarde,
    Eni Karde Tere Te Atyachaari,
    Ki Milda Teri Hatya Karke,
    Menu Ik Wari Dasn Insaan Oh "Paapi"
    Das Keda Rabb Kare Teri Rakhi,
    Kisamt Teri Dhur To Maadi,
    Satyug Vich v Rull Gyi Naari,
    Kalyug Vich Dekho "Mahabharat"
    Satyug Wali Paddo "Ramayan" Saari,
    Dekh Kudiya Te Hunde Atyachaar,
    "Mann" Akhiya Cho Neer Bahaya Hai.
    "Marjana" Likh Nahi Skda Dukh Kudiya De,
    Kyo Kudiya Hise Rabb Ne Sirf Dukh Hi Paya Hai. :'(
    "Mann Marjana"

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