Looking Back at Life


          The old dictum, ‘youth is wasted on the young’ is one that I seem to be in harmony with these days…Could the reason be a discord between the spirit of my mind and spirit of my body….willy-nilly one is slowing down and not keeping pace with the other. 

When I was young and filled with enthusiasm, I had the youthful energy as the driving force in me to take on new challenges to make the best of all that life offered...The momentum was all fast forward…

And sure, that's the way it should be….For youth dare where angels fear to tread. 
To have taken a pit stop then, to take stock and look back at ‘Life’ was definitely not a choice to be considered. In fact, that was the farthest from my mind.



It is only now,  that I am older and the energies have dipped, that I have begun to sit back and overview the years as they rolled for us….

That is for Bebe and I…. 


Where we've been, what we’ve done and what's still left to be done. …and heaven knows that my bucket list things still to be done is getting longer by the day. 
But in retrospect with almost 8 decades behind me, perhaps I am kinder to myself and a trifle more forgiving as well. You can say I am far more reflective than I was when I was 30 or 40 or say at 50. …. Looking back at my life, I feel blessed that I have had a great ride and have no complaints.



All the same, I do have a thing or two to say about ‘Time’ ….and that is to reiterate that ‘Time does fly’. I cannot put it in perspective technically as to how it does, but then the way years have sped by, they certainly seem to have got wings, and flown.
The interim years seem to be a blink and miss of time and space.

In all the interim years one of the most significant lessons I have learnt is that relationships are of supreme importance 


 I have learned, that people will forget what you said, people will also forget what you do or did.... but people will never forget the way you made them feel.


People matter.
The emotional quotient in relationships matter. 
Keeping relationships matter.
All these small nuances and values I have been picking up since I was a little boy, from my grandmother as well as my parents. It remains one of my most treasured beliefs that they have made me who I am.  Some days I stand on this land…land that has been for generations in my family and kind of look down a long driveway of memories and recollections come tumbling out, perhaps I should chronicle the innocuous happenings that have stood like beacons in my matrix of memories.

My Grandmother was one such beacon, an indomitable little woman; she lost her husband, my grandfather quite suddenly of heart attack, I was quite little at that time to make any kind of difference.
She was the matriarch of the clan…6 sons, 2 daughters and numerous nephews and nieces, but she never once, as far as I can remember, was dependant on anyone in managing the farm. 
Family for her, she always told us, would always be there whenever she needed them. She would always say that if you cannot count the on the family in life, then there is little else you can count on.


The family never let her down…uncles, aunts, cousins, all came together and she was the pivot. Thus get-togethers became a family a jamboree.
School holidays were always at the farm…. Waking up at the break of dawn with the smells from the kitchen wafting up to my room …. The smell of the freshly cooking flour in ‘desi ghee’ and sugar was enough to drive anyone out of their deep sleep.
Stuffing my pyjamas into my boots I would race down the stairs into the kitchen to find my grandmother stirring the ‘kada prashad’ for the daily ‘deg’ I just have to close my eyes and smells surround me again.


That remains one of my fondest memories of the many summers spent at grandmothers place.
My grandmother taught me many valuable lessons in those summers about life, including humanity, laughter, strength, and most importantly the importance of family. Looking back at the all too short span of a time I got to spend with my grandmother, she taught me some of the most precious morals that I carry with me still today. One of the toughest lessons that I had to deal with was the death of some of my most loved animal friends.
I thank God, for letting me spend as much time with my grandmother as he did. A lot of who I am and what I stand for started here on this farm on the outskirts of this village.
Today I am able to dwell on many pleasant and unpleasant events with more comfort and confidence. I accepted each event as part of life, regardless of whether it was a good or bad experience. I understand that moments in life transpire even when we are not prepared for it, but more importantly, it is how we deal with circumstances that keep us going forward.
My life has been a journey filled with challenging experience, which includes, leaving home…..and take a cue on the startup line with other young men, cadets to be exact 'Gentleman Cadets' , some of whom have become became friends for life.

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